It's been a lot longer than I planned since my last post and its not from a lack of content, but a lack of dedication and focus. For that, I do feel bad because its been an incredible last few months. Since my last post I've done a lot of traveling where I visited four new countries and toured the eastern US. Both trips were loaded with subject matter for multiple posts. However, as many things go, this has been put on the back burner. I'll try to capture these experiences into stories to share in the coming weeks.
For now, I just wanted to take a moment and reflect on the marathon that I completed yesterday. Not as a brag piece--because the results are not something I would even consider brag-worthy. Nonetheless, the marathon represents something more than an achievement to me. It's more symbolic on how I approach a lot of things in life.
This is one of my longest posts, but I had a lot to think about during the event.
This is one of my longest posts, but I had a lot to think about during the event.
A little character development...
In recent months, I've had people ask about my site's title. I don't claim the name of The Juggernaut because I am a huge X-Men fan. In fact, I am very limited in my knowledge of anything beyond the major movies when it comes to comics. I took the name because of how I tend to take something and run with it. From pop-culture obsessions, professional ambitions or personal goals; an idea is always the spark I need to get my fire going and then I have a hard time thinking of anything else.
The starting line...
The initial running spark came back in 2008 prior to ever have run longer than the annual Presidential Fitness Tests reminded my younger self that I was a lazy, fat piece of shit. I always hated those tests because I have never been athletic in any way--beyond being very good at cheating on the NES Power Pad.
In 2008, a couple friends and I decided to take on a half Marathon as a challenge to get into better shape. I took the training very seriously and took pride that I was pushing myself to limits I had never imagined. I honed my attention to hitting each milestone and checking goals off one by one. The race came and went and I found myself stronger in the end. Not just physically, but mentally and emotionally.
Since that first race, I have completed more than 15 half marathons and 5 full marathons. Which is the point I've been trying to get to tonight. As I sit on the couch and my muscles ache and my sunburn stings, I wanted to reflect on how the event affected me.
Up until this past Friday night, I was not sure if I was going to do the half or the full marathon. I was nowhere near trained for the full...nor the half for that matter. I had the option to use a friend's half marathon bib as he was not able to run in the race. But with that came the risk that I could be caught and banned from the event for life. My other option, besides sitting it out, was taking on the full marathon challenge. I opted for the latter, obviously.
I went to the start line optimistic that I could finish the event in the allowed 7 hour time limit. Even if I walked the entire thing, I would be able to make it. But I sure didn't want to do that.
Off to a bad start...
The race started and I was determined to run until I had to back down to a recovery walk. I queued up a podcast on my headphones and I began to run. As I crossed the start line, I clicked my GPS watch to track my pace.
My watch didn't respond and couldn't sync up to the GPS signal. As I weaved and ran, I tried to get my brand new technology to work, but nothing would work. I gave up and realized that I would be running this without any indication of how fast I was going. That was the first thing that got me into a bad head space.
As I watched the miles go by one by one, I started to notice that my breathing was getting increasingly more difficult. By the time I got to mile 5, the course officials put up a Red Flag, indicating that the weather is higher risk than normal for a marathon. A quick check on my phone and I realized we were over 80 degrees and over 90% humidity. That was enough to take my mind off my pace and I felt my run beginning to go off the rails.
Before I crossed the 6 mile mark, I found myself struggling with my performance as well as my emotions. Dark thoughts began to seep into my head. This particular race is always on Father's Day weekend and has been a struggle for me since my father passed away in 2011. That was enough to nearly bring me to a halt. I fought back the tears as I started to crumble internally.
Having issues with technology, weather and now a near emotional breakdown, my natural response was to lose my running stride and start walking. This was very hard for me to overcome, but I was not about to quit.
I tried to calm myself by convincing myself that it was ok to walk until my anxiety would inevitably subside. I switched from podcasts to my Marathon Playlist and turned on my cell phone's data so I could send out a couple tweets and snapchats.
Get by with a little help from my friends...
Twitter responded with several friends' words of encouragement at the exact right time. To those that did that simple gesture, I send a sincere thank you. I truly owe you a medal a hug or at least a beer, because it really reminded me that I would be able to make it through this.
I found myself getting out of the emotional rut I was stuck in and picked my pace back up. I was able to eek out a few more miles of running and re-calibrated my game plan. It was then that I set to establish a rhythm: run for two songs and then walk for a song.
With the occasional check into the social networks, I reserved the precious battery life of my phone by going back to airplane mode. Before I knew it, I was at mile 18 and was finally making it into town after miles of wooded highways and beautiful lakeside visions.
It was around that time that they upgraded it from Red Flag to Black Flag; High Risk Weather Conditions. Not only that, but my blue-tooth headphones ran out of juice and I was left listening to my own breath and that of those around me.
The end is near...
I took this as an opportunity to network in another way. As we were all walking at this point, it was easy to spark up a conversation with a nearby runner. After a few minutes of chatter, I felt inspired to run until I felt fatigued, where I would start up another conversation.
Along the way, I met a 70 year old that has run more than 50 marathons, a medic and his wife trying to run one in every state, multiple first timers and countless other people each with a great story of how they got to that particular place in the race. I even shared a couple drinks with spectators willing to share their beers or gin and tonic with a thirsty runner.
Throughout the miles, I came to realize that I couldn't rely on technology to cooperate or the weather to be picture perfect. Though I was under-trained, I was confident that I could make it to the finish. Although I hit several obstacles along the way, it really was the words of others that helped me push forward until it was over.
Though running is typically looked at as an individual sport, it is much better when shared with others. If there are any runners, aspiring runners or anyone looking to get into a healthy hobby, I encourage you to take the challenge. Shed your preconceived notion that it is all about time. When you don't worry about finishing in a certain time, you'll discover it is populated with incredible characters and you'll learn a lot about yourself along the way.
Thanks for reading (and especially those for tweeting: Will, Jeff, Simon, Jess, Edie, Travis, Stunt Z. and Thomas)
